Fifty Shades of Grey

That's about love, which is a totally different thing than what you can be instantly attracted to when you look at a picture of somebody. What you're describing is something that takes time. He's talking about an instant physical attraction and it doesn't have to be one that's in a picture. You can love and be attracted to your wife a lot, but if a total stranger who happens to be female with big boobs walks by, and you stare at her, that's an instant attraction and a biological instruction to perhaps mate with her that you're having.

I think even this is biological. I think the mind is part of the biology, too -- if you start to recognize that somebody is wrong for you because of their personality, your mind and your biology is going to react to this. What you say to somebody can trigger them to act totally different towards you. I don't believe our minds are even free. You can completely control people through your words and actions. That's why there's cult leaders and people who dominate, etc.

Minds are part of our biology, but when we think critically and make decisions this is a much 'newer' evolutionary function than our other traits such as our instinct, which has developed in mammals for millions of years. Critical thinking and reasoning is pretty undeveloped in comparison.

Most of "what you say" is in how you say it - aka the body language and tone of voice. The actual 'words' only account for 10% of communication.

The control still has more to do with their 'charismatic' behavior and use of body language than just with their 'words'.

This is why Presidents are taught extensively how to use body language effectively (ex. even the side of the picture you're own when you shake hands influences public perception) - this is why a guy with a huge vocabulary, but terrible posture and a weak, nasally voice would never be able to persuade a nation to go to war.

Well, still, everybody can be different with how smart they can be. Biology can determine how your mind works, what decisions you'll make, etc. Someone with a better brain can function better than someone with a lesser brain.

Oh, I'm not saying those things don't matter. They do matter. I'm not talking about just words here. Basically, how you communicate and how you come across can deeply affect people, as you're saying. It isn't just body language, though. Physical appearance matters, too. Being either male or female can matter. A woman, for example, could probably get away with murder a lot faster than a man because people tend to think women couldn't be criminals. And maybe because of evolution, that's true.

Anyway.... Fifty Shades of Grey.

Hi, Hijackers! STFU or Finish Your Business in Here!

It will be interesting to see it although I have a feeling it will look dated pretty soon. It cannot be as bad as The Playmaker though, which was one of the worst and least erotic erotic films ever. Although Colin Firth did wear some lovely jumpers.

__________________
You cannot have it both ways. A dancer who relies upon the doubtful comforts of human love can never be a great dancer. Never. (The Red Shoes, 1948)

In a "saw this and thought of this thread" way.

__________________
5-time MoFo Award winner.

Clever, but conveniently ignores actual incidents of abuse within the BDSM community.

Still debating whether or not to actually address 90sAce's last retort.

__________________
Iro's Top 100 Movies v3.0

Of course it does, it's an internet meme. As I said, it just made me think of this thread. I've not read this stuff for pages now.

Also ignores the fact that some BDSM members like terrible films

I heard that for FSOG some of the higher-end movie theaters are giving each ticket buyer a "safe word". If they say it during the film, an usher immediately appears, forcibly removes the patron's hand from his/her forehead, refunds their money, and walks them out the door.

__________________
Under-the-radar Movie Awesomeness.
http://earlsmoviepicks.blogspot.com/

I think comparisons to films causing violence are irrational, as are pretty much all of the predictable "Oh, so you can see a guy get shot but you can't see a nipple?!" arguments. The moral effects of depicting something are not analogous to how moral those things would be if they were real. If this were so, you'd say that an image of a mushroom cloud was more violent than a slasher film, even though that would be patently ridiculous.

Not all behaviors are equally imitable, either. It is much easier to imitate dialogue than sex, and it is much easier to imitate sex than, you know, murder. Not to mention that while violence is faked, nudity isn't.

I think it's pretty obvious that, yes, some people are going to see this film and venture into BDSM, perhaps unsafely and very likely with a distorted image of what it usually consists of. Whether or not this makes the filmmakers at all culpable is a much trickier question, but I don't see a serious argument that it won't happen at all.

__________________

yes, you're absolutely correct. I never read the book, but I read all the reviews by real movie reviewers, and I think even rotten tomatoes put one out. All the reviewers pretty much HATED the movie. And they describe it exactly what it was like, and I don't blame them. What I can't figure out, like you said is, WHY did that book sell so many copies? For example, if I put out another sleazy book, with the same or even worse subject for sex between several people, would that also sell?WHO is buying this book? That's what I'd really like to get a review of; a nice big fat statistic of exactly who buyss this book, what type of people? Who the heck? I don't think it's a lot of young people or teenagers. I think a lot of teenagers and young people are too hip..

Attached Images

 

__________________
"We Want To Believe The Lies We Want To Be True, NOT The Real Truth."

I think you're correct, about people entering into BDSM, without a manual.NOT a good idea.. It's another one of those "let's make this very risky activity, look very glamorous and fun!" – – Right into a movie. I think a lot of people would get freaked out, or hysterical, or hurt emotionally, or get scared, or have a bad time, if they tried this very unprepared. Just because you see it in a movie, doesn't mean it's really that GREAT. Ever since Sharon Stone tied up guys to her bed, with silk scarf, everybody thinks it's terribly terribly sexy.BLAH!

Attached Images

 

hey, I hate to tell you this,but there is a major upheaval in coed colleges, around the subject of women getting raped at them. It is a big deal, and it's going federal government! Reason being, coed college campuses are so dangerous for women now, that there is constantly attempted rape or rape, and a lot of the times the colleges don't report it or take it seriously. They are trying to blame the women for it. Probably just for being on a campus with men! So you can't really say that this is NOT going on in our society because it is. SORRY, I don't think you can avoid it that easily.

Also, since women have joined all the military THAT SUBJECT has gotten really bad in that category. Apparently women are not safe to join the military, and fight side-by-side with men. There have been too many cases of sexual assault by their superiors, or by their colleagues, it's getting ridiculous. It is happening in the military ALL THE TIME!

I don't think women should join the military. Even during the 50s, everybody knew that women who went into the Army, were going to be told and ordered to have sex with anybody that wanted it. It was a big fat joke! Any women who joined the Army were really stupid! And I knew some of them and, they were. Nobody in their right mind who's a woman would ever join the military. Especially not now. It's gotten a lot worse, because now they will take any guy, any guys at all, no matter how criminal or crazy or murderess, they'll take him into the military. So you can imagine how bad it would be for young women trying to join the military.

I don't think you can blame all the male – Army– guys' bad behavior on the women's military uniforms, fellow!NO WAY. Did you know that if you go to an Arabic country, in the Middle East, and you are a female, (no matter who you are) you cannot go out walking alone by yourself and not get sexually molested by somebody. That's the truth, I know women who used to live over there.women in the Middle East have to completely cover themselves up, and if they go out of the house anywhere, they have to go in solid groups. They are not safe going out one at a time.

Fellows, the world is not a safe place, especially for women and I don't know where you got that idea in the first place.women all different kinds even old women, or little girls get raped or sexually assaulted every single day. And it's not because they're wearing something daring!

Attached Images

     

I would say 99% women, aged thirty and upwards.


The hype drove the sales- and I guess as it started life as Twilight fanfiction there was already an audience for it; people who were internet savvy. And of course the more people read it, the more others wanted to read it because they didn't want to miss out.


I'd say part of the appeal is because it's an unknown world to the readers and so they imagine it to be exotic. People love watching and judging other people's behaviour and there's certainly a lot to judge in Fifty Shades of Grey.


It reminds me of this quote from Lady Chatterley's Lover: "It's the one thing they won't let you be, straight and open in your sex. You can be as dirty as you like. In fact the more dirt you do on sex the better they like it. But if you believe in your own sex, and won't have it done dirt to: they'll down you."




In writing Fifty Shades of Grey, E.L James is essentially being open about desire (admittedly not most people's sort of desire) in a way that people wouldn't be in real life. It's not dressed up as a literary book- it's 'honest'- embarrassingly so.


I should be seeing the film in a few weeks so I'll see how it turns out.

Oh, really? Well, then, maybe they just shouldn't go to college, either, since according to you, college campuses are nothing but RAPE ZONES where if you're a woman and you're going to school there, chances are, you're going to get raped! By all the SCARY MEN who are coming after them!!!!!!!!!

Oh, I agree. If you're going to have sex, no matter what kind it is, be sure to have an instruction manual at your side at all times. You might even want to take BDSM training classes (I hear spring is the best time for that) and forget having just a "safe word" -- you need a parent or guardian to be watching over the S&M act at all times. I don't care if your mom's 94 years old -- she needs to be there to make sure it goes okay and that you're safe. If you don't want her to watch, she can wear one of the blindfolds. As long as she's there and she can hear what's going on. That's how it is with Captain Spaulding and I -- I'm always in the room with him.

What's safe word do you and Captain use?