← Back to Reviews
in
Cherry 2000
WHY'D I WATCH IT?
Cherry 2000
Action / English / 1987
WHY'D I WATCH IT?
Aaand back to 80s sci-fi. Really making the rounds now aren't we? Red-headed Action Girl in a future wasteland? Let's do it (also neat poster).
WHAT'D I THINK? *SPOILERS*UUUUGGGHHHHH... more like Crappy 2000.
Cats, donkeys, snakes, fish, Cherry 2000 is about as sub-par as it gets.
We open up on a man learning the hard way why you never get water on your robot wife before learning that his robot wife's model, Cherry 2000 is so outdated that it can only be found in the lawless wasteland outside of a world where sex requires a contract. For some reason.
He meets up with E. Johnson, our red-headed Action Girl, immediately underestimates her (because she's a woman you see), before eventually going with her to track down his sex doll.
It goes exactly where you think it goes.
He learns that robot love is not "real love". No, real love is with a human who will unabashedly lie to you. Mmmmyeahh, kiss 'em smooch smooch.
Ironically the acting on part of the robot changes specifically to fit this purpose since they only begin to act lifeless after this revelation comes to him. In fact, the acting in this movie as a whole is so understated that I felt suddenly ripped out of it when one of the victims of the villain, Lester, actually seemed like an actual person.
I'm talkin' about the guy on the left here. I liked him.
Okay, a bit of a caricature, but SOME kind of personality.
Lester himself seems like a pretty unique villain in terms of how he's framed. He's sets up his wasteland home as a sort of resort paradise and he talks to his cronies in bizarrely familial terms:
Not very villain-like, and THAT'S OKAY! I thought it was kinda funny how he wouldn't go out for revenge until he made sure his wife had packed sandwiches, BUT the problem here is I don't think the actor playing him gave much of a crap or was incapable of making him more interesting.
If he had a little more charisma he could have been a very memorable villain, but instead he's forgettable, like everyone else including E. Johnson who resolutely fails to bring any sort of life to the movie despite the "spunkiness" that was foreshadowed.
Naturally the romance is your traditional Overnight variety and it's about as baffling as it gets with our climax forcing our hero to choose between the strangely virginal E. Johnson and the Cherry 2000 who willingly exits a plane and approaches gunfire at the request of a Pepsi.
Just kind of a dumb ****in' movie without the 80s camp that makes less ambitious movies like Adventures in Babysitting fun or more ambitious movies like Looker interesting to think about.
Instead, you're left to puzzle over whether you missed something or they actually fit 7 ATVs into a truck.
Final Verdict: [Just... Bad]
Cats, donkeys, snakes, fish, Cherry 2000 is about as sub-par as it gets.
We open up on a man learning the hard way why you never get water on your robot wife before learning that his robot wife's model, Cherry 2000 is so outdated that it can only be found in the lawless wasteland outside of a world where sex requires a contract. For some reason.
He meets up with E. Johnson, our red-headed Action Girl, immediately underestimates her (because she's a woman you see), before eventually going with her to track down his sex doll.
It goes exactly where you think it goes.
He learns that robot love is not "real love". No, real love is with a human who will unabashedly lie to you. Mmmmyeahh, kiss 'em smooch smooch.
Ironically the acting on part of the robot changes specifically to fit this purpose since they only begin to act lifeless after this revelation comes to him. In fact, the acting in this movie as a whole is so understated that I felt suddenly ripped out of it when one of the victims of the villain, Lester, actually seemed like an actual person.
I'm talkin' about the guy on the left here. I liked him.
Lester himself seems like a pretty unique villain in terms of how he's framed. He's sets up his wasteland home as a sort of resort paradise and he talks to his cronies in bizarrely familial terms:
Be friendly, yet firm.
Remember guys, life is an adventure.
Keep the sun out of your eyes and be yourselves.
If he had a little more charisma he could have been a very memorable villain, but instead he's forgettable, like everyone else including E. Johnson who resolutely fails to bring any sort of life to the movie despite the "spunkiness" that was foreshadowed.
Naturally the romance is your traditional Overnight variety and it's about as baffling as it gets with our climax forcing our hero to choose between the strangely virginal E. Johnson and the Cherry 2000 who willingly exits a plane and approaches gunfire at the request of a Pepsi.
Just kind of a dumb ****in' movie without the 80s camp that makes less ambitious movies like Adventures in Babysitting fun or more ambitious movies like Looker interesting to think about.
Instead, you're left to puzzle over whether you missed something or they actually fit 7 ATVs into a truck.
Final Verdict: [Just... Bad]