The 2nd MoFo Hall of Infamy : Son of Infamy

The Misty Green Sky (2019)


I wasn't sure if this was a porno with the sex scenes cut out...or a video game with the game play cut out. This felt like a PSI video game like Silent Hill meets Metroid where a woman with a virus is running around a base. The animation is terrible, it's clearly a cheaply made film but I kinda liked part of it. The music wasn't half bad and it had sort of a tone of a nightmare like The Quiet Earth(1985). Also the ideas for a story are there and interesting but the execution is just so bad. I also was trying to follow the plot and I couldn't because it felt like chunks of story were removed. And then they had all that stuff with god which was weird but no necessarily bad.

The Legend of Titanic (1999)

I can clearly see why this film was nominated. You would not have had seagulls in the middle of the Atlantic it's just not possible. Huge fail on the writers part....

Y'know what this bad but it wasn't terrible...it was stupid but it wasn't dumb. This was the story of a pair of star crossed lovers on the Titanic the girl has magical powers so she can talk to animals. The Killer Whales, Dolphins, Giant Octopus, Mice, Dogs...are the good guys and the Sharks and Cats are the bad guys...genius. The funny thing with this film is it's such a great bad disney movie. I laughed at loud at portions of the story. They made the sinking of the Titanic funny I can't hate on that.

The villains of this film are also top notch...a wealthy one eyed man wants to marry an heiress so he can murder dolphins and whales...and he's working with talking sharks who are like gangsters. I think that stuff is brilliant because once again it's bad but it's amusing I was amused by this film. Also weirdly like Misty Green Sky it had good music.

Titanic And the Legend Goes On(2000)


Well the titles a lie because it only had 20 minutes of story when you cut out the credits, introductions and musical numbers. This was the lesser of the two Titanic movies with mouse characters...frankly I didn't get much of a feeling for any of the animals in this one. This focuses more on the romance between Cinderella and Jack but rich also you have a lot of villains like 8 or 9 of them that I couldn't keep track of. I actually think I hated this one more than some of the other ones because it was polished enough with animation and cast but it was so short and uninspired. I don't know if any of the songs were actually written for the film or if they were just bought and jammed in their.

I admit, I didn't think this Titanic was as bad as the other, either. I only nommed this to match the other. Heck, the other's a 0 while this was a 3/10. I mean, this was just a dorky and cute kid's movie, so you can only hate it so much, right? At least it's dorkiness came from originality.

The Incredible Petrified World (1959)

Watch order is so important when it comes to certain films. This was a microbudget B picture that while it wasn't good it didn't feel like the incomplete films I had watched earlier. The premise of the film is a group of adventures dive into the sea and end up in a vast underwater canyon.

Well they say it's vast the film is almost like a TV bottle episode where the whole film takes place in a single room redressed for each scene. And yes that's bad but compared to everything else I've seen is it really noteworthy. The group come across another guy under the sea and they start to fracture and panic.

Normally when a third act would come along and the setup would give us some payoff...perhaps a hidden undersea monster or the group would start widdling down it's numbers.

We didn't get any of that they were rescued by characters we saw earlier in the film

can someone send me a link to HEartbreak High that my virus protection software will allow me to watch

@SpelingError - can you possibly weave your magic here?

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Pretty sure I saw it on Tubi. Kinky Coaches.

It's on Tubi, but I sent another link anyways.

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IMDb
Letterboxd

I think only some countries have access to Tubi. I don't know where Siddon lives though.

The sex teen film is a fairly tired genre I think the genre really ran from 73' to 84' starting with American Graffiti and ending with Revenge of the Nerds. With each installment trying to outdo itself with it's premise and sex exploits. When done properly you end with something like this....



Perfect no notes...or you have a massive cast of relatable and identifiable characters like in Grease





A dare I say perfect film....but maybe you don't have a perfect film maybe you have a star and you can use your film to highlight that star...



Kinky Coaches and the Pom Pom Pussycats is just a film of half measures. It's got some jokes a couple of good bits and Mr Roper from three's company taking top billing and doing schtick for about five minutes. But really this is just a whole lot of nothing. A lot of football sex puns that now feel like dad jokes...a group of characters who are on two different teams but you don't who they are only what they do. And some of the jokes feel like ripoffs...like one character is clearly the Belushi of the group but all he makes are pig noises. If you are going to go crazy than go full out crazy this one just kinda layed there and did nothing.

A Talking Cat?!(2016)

Yeah I'm pretty sure this was a money laundering scam or an attempt to make a product to sell to a streaming site. Anyways this is a pretty bad film. It's basically a story about a pair of families a rich father/son and a broke mother/twins. The cat is in the woods and travels to both houses...he has a rule where he can only speak once to each person.

This was definitely a failure of a film, like one those titanic films the padding is blatantly obvious where a 45 minute TV is stretched out with long screen saver type shots. The cat talking effects are hilariously bad and you wonder if the cheeseball bit was added to try and get some of that bad movie "The Room" type thing.

You can also tell it's a low budget film because the parents were ugly as hell. Makes you feel like they were working for SAG cards and insurgence. Also Eric Roberts totally ripped off Jason Robards in A Boy and His Dog...I think he's actually doing an impersonation.

Loqueesha (2019)

Am I going to get 7 reviews on one page.... SNL did a bit where they mocked those family dramas where the writer is the guy going through a divorce. In the scene the small child looks up and tells his mom that his dad is a good person. Y'know the ego stroking thing no real person would ever say. Well I just watched the unironic version of that story for 2 agonizing hours.

Yeah this was bad....you can tell one man wrote, starred, and directed it because only one person would put out a product this terrible. It's basically a rant and a film made around it. Bill Burr kinda does this but Burr doesn't pretend to be a black woman and doesn't make obvious hackneyed comments. The other problem with the film is that it doesn't know what it is...the second act the main actor starts becoming schizophrenic like he's in Liar Liar and that is just dropped so the film can get a new antagonist.

The concept and acting is terrible but the construction isn't so it's not going to be at the top of my list but it's going to be a bunker type where I can easily picks above it and below it.

Carnival of Souls (1998)


Ah 90's horror the generation of the best and worst, for every Sixth Sense, Silence of the Lambs, Scream you get stuff like this. Carnival of Souls would win this hall as the best film of this group. Fact of the matter is this is a hodge podge of It, Jacob's Ladder, and Carnival of Souls less a remake of the titular original. Larry Miller gets to ham it up as pedo clown taunting some girl. A number of things in this film I actually liked...some of the scares worked and you had proper action sequences.

Really the only thing that sinks this film into the "bad" territory is the score and soundtrack. Which is hilariously over the top everything else in the film is just middle of road. The purgatory element of the story works well and they really hit the twist over the head which makes it feel like Jacob's Ladder for dummies. But the ferryman, the pig creatures, the clowns...all that stuff worked for me. I would give this film two stars.

Candy (1968)


I have never been a fan of obnoxious films the whole hey lets grab someone with a bunch of energy and laugh at them. In the 60's a bunch of films like this came out...many of them are good Putney Swope, Mr Freedom, I even like Myra Breckinridge. But this...this was painful.

This is the worst Walter Matthau performance I ever saw...and I watched Dennis the Menace. The worst offenders was Richard Burton whos caterwauling performance made me want to reach for the fast forward button on multiple occasions. Everyone in this film is bad and it feels like they are doing bad sch-tick loud long obnoxious monologues

A movie like this I can understand why it was made but you would think the editors would try and fix it or redo it to make it watchable. This could have been a tight bad 80 minutes but 2 hours...this was just garbage.

Nice I was able to take up the whole page with my reviews....and I got it done just in time.

That just leaves @TheUsualSuspect and the MIA @ueno_station54 - the latter hasn't posted anywhere on MoFo for 19 days.

Have you sent her a PM?

Yeah, around 4-6 days ago checking on her, but I haven't had any reply yet.

Any word on your progress?