Gonna go ahead and post a review I read that perfectly sums up why I won't be watching this piece of ****:
"This is not okay.
I'm so tired of saying those words. I'm so tired of a lifetime of seeing this type of content and having to fight the standards ingrained into our society by talking about it. I'm tired of telling myself and other people that the only reason why content such as this becomes a placeholder for romance and sexual gratification is because we were all raised to see it that way rather than raised to condemn it, to be revolted by it, to speak out against it.
I remember reading stories on Wattpad, a place where all young writers found themselves in the search for an audience for their work. I wrote very little, mostly out of insecurity of the very few likes I did receive, but I read. I read a lot. I read fanfiction, I read original ideas, I read what my friends recommended and I even read what my friends wrote. And more than anything, it feels like I read stories like these.
That's not a joke. I know a lot of people are comparing this to Wattpad stories from our preteen and teenage years as a joke, and I understand the humour (I even made one myself) but I need you to know that this isn't a joke. It's not funny. This is a serious consequence of a world that has been built by men, for men, for the pleasure of men. And the most horrifying part of all of this is that it has been ingrained in our society for so long and so subtly and even so violently that now it is an actual source of sexual pleasure. And I'm angry. I'm really angry about this because I thought we were past it, I thought we had moved on, but apparently not.
I mean, has anyone currently in their twenties actually taken the time to reflect on our most formative years? Wattpad fanfiction, Omegle with the camera on, the beginning of Snapchat. When I was fifteen a group of boys put together a Google Drive folder of all the nudes they had taken or saved - always without consent because let me remind you that I was fifteen - and sent it around to hundreds of people. Fifty Shades of Grey came out during our childhood. The toxic relationships of Bella and Edward, Katniss and Gale, and endless more were written during our childhood. The domination over women has been glorified and sexualised in our society, the men who have abused it not only forgiven but respected. This isn't an old issue but one that is modern, that is crushing, that is still preventing women from equality in our world. And the more things like this that are released, the worse it gets. This isn't just on Netflix; it's the third most trending movie on Netflix. And we're laughing at it, we're joking about the fanfiction we wrote as teenagers, but while we laugh there are real teenagers today who are finding pleasure in this. Teenagers who are believing this is what romance looks like, that this is how women should be in relationships, that it is not only okay but a secretly desirable fantasy to be enslaved by a man.
This is Stockholm syndrome and it isn't sexy, it isn't cute, it isn't love. Laura never loves this man but is manipulated by him, abused by him, hurt by him. He has destroyed her with wealth and physical & emotional abuse and, most of all, with a society that says this is okay, that says this is the romantic goal. This is a rapist, a murderer, an abuser, and he is written to be the source of the most romantic love Laura will ever know. It isn't the film I have a problem with (well, it is, but it's not the main problem) - it's the fact that it exists and the fact that both girls and boys are being conditioned to find pleasure in it, to watch it, to crave it (bringing other gender identities into the conversation is also important, but for the sake of this film and who it represents, I'm only going to mention the impact on those who identify as male or female). The brain is always changing and the young are impressionable; there is a reason why porn is addictive, there is a reason why it has become more and more violent over the years, there is a reason why stuff like this continues to be created and romanticised and eroticised. It's a symptom, not the source.
"He is your caretaker and your defender. When you are with him, you feel like a little girl."
This kind of fantasy always has the same power dynamic: someone in a position of power taking advantage of and abusing a younger figure. It's fine to experiment, it's fine to explore and find enjoyment in different fantasies, it's fine to do exciting things in a safe environment with trusted partners. It is not fine to romanticise this type of abuse and manipulation and statutory-rape fantasy, this ideal of being a little girl taken care of by an older, wealthier, dominant man. And I'm tired of sexual assault being a source of erotic pleasure - I have said it before, I will say it again over and over and over, but you cannot have a sexual assault scene in an erotic film without making the assault itself erotic. Plus, the protagonist assaulted her just as much, if not more, than the men actually written to be called out for their abuse. This entire film glorifies sexual assault and emotional manipulation and toxic relationships. It glorifies the societal ideal of sexualising young girls and older men. It glorifies the exact thing feminists such as myself are fighting against.
We've been fighting against it for a long time. We will be fighting against it for even longer. But I want you to know that this isn't what love looks like. This isn't what a healthy, exciting, erotic relationship looks like. This is dangerous, this is toxic, this will damage impressionable youth for years.
Maybe I shouldn't have written a review because it's clear most of this community isn't taking it seriously, is laughing at it and mocking it for it's sexist and toxic story. But we need to take it seriously because it really isn't funny. And it isn't okay." (
https://boxd.it/1dtPdN)