+3
Too many Woody Allen quotes to list even more than a few.
"Is sex dirty? Only if it's done right."
"True, you're not too tall and kind of ugly, but what the hell? I'm short enough and ugly enough to succeed on my own."
"Checking the cell structure... the cell structure has been checked."
"Jew eat?"
"Hey, don't knock masturbation. It's sex with someone I love."
"I had a mad impulse to throw you down on the lunar surface and commit interstellar perversion."
"To you, I'm an atheist. To God, I'm the loyal opposition."
"I don't know enough to be incompetent."
"After fifteen minutes I wanted to marry her, and after half an hour I completely gave up the idea of stealing her purse."
"Blood! That should be on the inside!"
"It was pithy. It had... great pith."
"I once stole a pornographic book that was printed in braille. I used to rub the dirty parts."
"Shall we say pistols at dawn? Well, we can say it. I don't know what it means, but we can say it."
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It's what you learn after you know it all that counts. - John Wooden
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